Take a deep breathe and have a break enjoy your day ...

Just with a big smile on your/my face . =)

take a deep breath and have a break to enjoy your day .

Finally , I finished my Math , Science and Geog internal plus practices . It's pretty stress to have exams just in one day and tomorrow I have another internal for my Geog for Task 1.b which it's killing me but I'm here just 'cause of my resource sheets are with the teacher so I think I don't need to study it first ? Whatever it says , just wanna say I had my very first tuition here . It's kinda boring just to face an old lady in a small space just like the bathroom that I'm having now . I'm tire after school but for my mum she said that's the only time to have tuition I'm bored just to have tuition . I thought I come here I don't need to tuition anymore but tuition refreshed my mind ...

Remembered last time I used to tuition with my wifey but now no one are accompanying me to tuition class and there's no someone like them who text me while I'm having tuition . It's so boring when you don't know what to talk and do . The first day of tuition I already receive homework and it's just killing me write the title which is ' Changing Countries ' . For me I think people nowadays won't want to change anything in their life yet , good things often come from change . As I think this topic reminds me that day I left the country where I used to live in and where all my friends were and all the fun memories were all at there but now I have to start a brand new journey which make me feel different . I don't wanted to change after I'm here . I was bagging to come early but it's always too late to regret . The conclusion are always regret and what to think about the future life of here ? A little joke it's all the teachers in the tuition center though William and I were from China and I was like wth ? I'm 100% pure Malaysian can't you see ? Besides that , they kept calling me with the wrong name which it's Jessica , Jenny ? Gosh ! My name is not that hard to pronounce right ? ==

Questions marks ; ?

What you will do when you want to release stress ?

What you will have when you want a break ?

What make you feel worst ?

maybe she's right I might be .

Pretty embarrassing to say that ....

I'm just low enough to be immature and retarded .

I'm not that good in English as I went to interview for the tuition last week . Pretty embarrassing to say that the teacher has tested me , JessieTanJiaXin has the english standard of 10 to 11 years old in New Zealand . I just can't believe the standard of mine would be that low ... I'm 15 and I have the english skill of 10 to 11 years old ? I was like WTF ?

What to say ? I was pretty sad when I heard and knew that I'm that low ... Please dont laugh at me when you see this post I'm now depressing and wonder why they look at me just like I'm an idiot or even a jerk ? Kinda sad when I feel that .

p/s: Carmen Pang , I got something to ask and mention to you !

better find me when you're on .

.emtrofmocotereheblliwuoyhsiwi

=(

First time of 1 hour 2 minutes and 55 second talk .

I'm glad there's someone like her who came can ring me up and wasted one hour just on me with our jokes . The girl I met , Carmen Pang ... She told me things she's not happy at and I told her mine . We are humans and we have feelings no point for saying I hope so ...

I talked with Carmen today it's kinda surprise when I talked to her 'cause I though she will change the way she talk but who knows she swore in every sentences and that was what we used to be I just dont know why I feel weird with those words . LOL !

Forget about what I typed just to remind Carmen that I'm glad you called and talked to me today and I do appreciate it !

You're the really first one and

I'm still waiting you to get a webcam !

You're such a slower ...

Please don't ever mention pv and ts and say I forgot you're in NZ .

the really memories .

chik - chak .

p/s: Carmen ! next time we can skype through my phone !

I'm still waiting you to take 'RapidKL' to come here .

So as ChoonWei to get a GPS . =)

Sunny , rain and sushi day !

It's weekend !

I wonder what's people doing out there with the Wasak day , i think . In the afternoon , my mum and aunty Chris went out to buy some ingrediants for tonight's dinner which it's sushi ! =)

Carmen and I stayed at home and William went out with James just to watch Price of Persia .

It's kinda weird when two boys went to watch a movie . (fag)

Before the thing start just want to mention that I spent the day just stayed at home and cleaning up the rooms , taking photos and also prepare food for our dearest brothers and sis !

Let's let the photo do the typing .

reviewing of the ingredients .

My favorite ! *sorry for the blur picture I took*

let's see .

- Salmon

- Cucumber

- Egg

- Mayo

- Seaweed

- Rice

- pear ?

The favorite we put in the sushi role .

we did the triangle sushi which taste pretty good !

Full view of my house's dining room .

Don't you think it's kinda pretty ?

=)

Used to ask but not nowadays .

I asked but I think it's not the time .

It's Monday the 6th week of second term which mean 5 weeks left until mid-term holiday ! Say hey at first and say booo !!! Sometimes I just wish that I fly where ever I wanted to but wish couldn't be true sometimes . I knocked some people's wall in fb yesterday I was wishing they would reply immediately but at that time I think I was dreaming (dont ever expect too much) and yet I started to sent 'knock knock !' to some of them today again ! I was too free but knock mean something to me , just like a stranger wanted to know more about people's although I don't know he/she well enough . It's kinda strange when you see I knocked so many people's wall but please reply ! =D

When I was in fb only J-sern was there . Although I wasn't close to him last time (in sm) but I think we're kinda close friends now just 'cause talking crap and being RETARDED enough in the web . I always wonder who else are free enough to be retarded and spam the 'NewsFeed' . Last few days being retarded with me was Gin but they are having exam so no one will willing to be retard with me . Been awhile I wanted to me retard or even a bastard just to being mean and evil to people without thinking . I know I'm mean !

I enjoyed today's Science class 'cause the girl who sit beside me and the boy are being so hyper just to asking me questions and being retard ! (I wonder would you count how many tomes did I mention ' retard ' ?) Account class it's kinda bored just 'cause of the whether and the teacher . Besides that , Geog and Maths are totally BORING !!! What I learnt in Maths class it's how to make sentences about the range and graph . Geog is studying 1080 ? I asked what is it but I just can't get it . English it's normal , a good girl like me always sits in the corner and read my book without noticing the time flies . I started to colour in my Art class it's kinda interesting but it's really hard to colour just without someone to talk to ...

I love M'sia 's school , people , language , building , conversation , shopping mall but I love NZ's whether , food , education and the way they manage the school ...

I miss the sweetness of McFlurry !

The Mcd here it's kinda weird ! the cone of it it's in triangle although the sundae it's almost the same but there's nothing like McFlurry . I wanted to eat an oreo McFlurry so badly !!!! The special McD about here it's there are pork/ bacon and they have frozen coke ! =)

Better don't expect too much .

Saturday was the 141th day in the year . Nothing special about that day just spend the day at home and tried my very best to finish my work ! It's kinda bored at home but I found something really interested me ... I found a guy which can just put everything at the first but not himself ! I'm just glad that I have a friend like him although I dont know him well but still I just appreciate the time he spent just to calm someone ... The day ended with silence but we went to city today ! sis bought some clothes , mum bought some leggings and me ? I ate full back home which always make me gained weight again . * I gonna broke my promise *

Sunday , the 23rd of May . Always the boring day , it's my day to clean up ! (argggg) Woke up around 0830 and clean up prepare to go Sunday Market and woke my mum up and when to kicten and *ding* some bread for me and bro with a cup of hot chocolate which will always make me sober enough for do things . After that , Carmen woke up and started to make breakfast which is bacon and egg it's so western ! After eating went to sunday market and walk walk walk . We met James , Vanessa and uncle Alex there . I bough a pants for sleep ? lol ...

After that went to have our lunch with aunty May and uncle Ben also Natalie together . after lunch went to walk around Takapuna . I bought a cloths from Supre and 1 pair of jeans from TOPSHOP ! Do you know TOPSHOP in NZ it's a really branded stuff and it just open like for 2 months . I prefer Malaysia's one more than here . The clothes are alright but I likey M'sia's . =) After shopping when to a lolli shop ! bought some jelly beans and lollies with hockey pockey ... Then went back to Wairau and buy some stuff ... Home sweet Home after some times . It's kinda tired and full again ! I wonder why I get so full recently ? I really need to put on diet but it's raining everyday with windy clouds .

Went back home and clean up , prepare for school's thing then ate my dinner . However , I chatted with yang , grace and jing for awhile and now I'm here typing all these . No pictures for these few days .

Sometimes , I just can't smile according to my feelings .

Happy enough but not happy enough to smile .

Foo Foo !!!

I might be late or it's not ?

Btw , I'm here to wish my Foo Foo !

who's the bitch that makes me laugh all the time and

the one who always fight with me ( boobs , butt and !@#$%^&* )

Here comes the little memories . I lost most of the picture and I just realize we didn't take much photos . ==

Happy Sweet 16 .

My Foo Foo !!!

I love You .

It's the newest picture I took with you .

Kiss from the only her .

Kiss from me to her . Bitchyyyy

The bitchest pose of hers .

She's a whore too . =)

The serious face of her but ....

*scroll down*

this is the scary face of her .

UNO player got crazy ?

Camera shy ?

like one years ago .

The biggest hug of hers .

In genting I forgot what was the date but I can still remember how we trapped in the theme park . I just love it and can't forget about it .

Lastly , I wanna wish the bitch , slut , whore Happy Birthday !

I will get a present for you but not in this time .

=D

it took longer than I though .

Finally , it's a free day .

How am I going to explain a free day as ?

I'm ' free ' of homework .

I'm ' free ' of eating .

I'm ' free ' to play .

I'm ' free ' to miss .

I'm ' free ' to sing .

I'm ' free ' to listen .

I'm ' free ' to blog !

Everything seems to be free to me just for today i think ?

Today's weather is freaking cold no sun for the whole day and we walked home while it's raining sometimes it felt good to walk in the rain . It made me staring at my shoe / my feet how it moved and how it works like . I kept smiling when I was walking it make me think of the last time Hoe , Quan , Joe and I was running to Gipo's house . I always wanted it to happen again but nothing will happen exactly the same as it is all past .

I was viewing people's blog as I don't know them at all . I realize to become a blogger is not easier than I though . =) So I decided to be a simplest blogger ever , I want simple life , simple blog , simple comment , simple love from the only them . Although the love don't really live here anymore ... No one is perfect but they are the one who makes me feel perfect . I miss them but I though of ' that should be me in the photo ; that should be me in the status ; that should be me in your heart ; that should be me in the video . ' Everything I saw I though of the same thing just ' that should be me ' .

Yang , Jing and I were chatting in my status I think ? Yang introduce me a song by JB although I don't really like him but I like that song , ' That Should Be Me ' . The lyrics it's kinda simple but i just like it . I always though of the same thing which wrote in the lyrics . I wondered what happen to Yang ? He seems to be so quite and so emo nowadays ? I think everything , everyone , every moment changed ! No point for saying it when no one wants it to be back to normal .

Day in school wans't fun as I though .

I though I can make really good friends ; I though I can make more friends just the same as my sis ; I though I can catch up easily ; I though I can get some friends ; I though my maths is good enough ; I though account it's hard for me ; I though geog class was easy ; I though art class it's fun ; I though english it's hard for me ; I though science it's easy for me .

Everything I though it's opposite .. I wonder how you make friends when you're in standard 1 or even form 1 ?

Tomorrow is a day my ' tobelove 's birthday ' .

I dont know what to do so I might just blog something in the blog or I send a really late present for her ? hmmm ...

documents which chill me .

Title has shown what I wanted to say .

I always wanted to ask questions about these documents but I dont really have the time of it . However , Now I have some of the time to ask about it . =D

there are 7 pages which included ;

1st the cover which full of signature .

2nd big words by Janice .

3rd full of words by nee nee ? I always wonder it's moonie or Loh Sze Nee ?

4th by the only DaiBs by Saw Jing Wei I though but the truth is who ? hmm ...

5th a word on that page which is Honey .

6th suppose to full of hand writing by Brenda Ng but what I see is ... only last few sentence she wrote it herself .

7th the page that I love the most which it always chill me up with . By Foo Xue Sze .

what she wrote is meaningful to me and the ps little things it's lovely .

1st page sign by the love ones which really full of love .

2nd . scroll down and there's the question .

" P/S : i'm crying , hahaha. =( "

As people said never let the love ones cry but I have did it how am I going to live ?

the second page full of words the notice it's JANGAN NANGIS which I didn't but I laugh .

=D

3rd page ;

By DaiBs . I always wonder this is written by Wei or Xuan ?

4th ; I can't stop look at the words . I just wonder this is write by Brenda or Janice loh ? hmm ...

5th ; The love ones by Brenda Ng .

she didn't write this but the only last two sentences .

' I REALLY MISS YOU

wo ai ni !! TAN + * . Muaks !! '

I was like wth ? but it's still sweet enough for me . =D

the last page by SZE .

I love this really much it make me cry when I read this at the airport .

at that moment . =D

I love this sentence .

=D

Need some fresh air !

I was busy with my school works past few weeks and even the weekend . My dad came last Tuesday (110510) and he left just in the morning of today . He came to help us clean up the house and editing the house with his ' genius brain ' ! =) what to say Will and I don't really have much time to chat with him about the school things 'cause of the school works and those assignments are dragging me to hell . However , I bet we can have more time with him in the next term . What to say ? my sis got her new phone which was what I wanted to have E72 it's in brow and I love it too bad my X6 is not with me yet thanks to my genius dad . He forgot to bring it here and he left it in his office ! GOSH !!!!!

Something to say it's that I've moved into my new house and I enjoy my life here ( not at school ) . Another thing it's that I won't able to blog as often as last time 'cause of school work and I don't really know what to blog . I spent all my life with sleep , eat , work and random stuff . Sorry boss , i dah gained weight sangat depress a ...

As yesterday I spent my time in fb with the crazy boys ever . The very first time I love them . The only them i never close up with ... I always wanted to know them more until yesterday I know how crazy they could be and how cute they are . I just can't stop laughing at the way they spam my wall and chatting crap in just 30 minutes . That day was a fairytale .

I will try my best update back the thing i have been through last few days . like mothers day and bla bla bla . =)

love me before you leave and tag .

Mothers' day ; love from us .

Mother's day ; the only thing we can give it's just this .

It's mother's day .

Nothing special but this is the only day we should say thanks and the day we should do something for the Mums' . =D Woke up and clean up the new house and what we do it's went to Pak n' Save for dinner's ingredients . we bought that like 500something which it's a really expensive dinner ! hahaha

More pictures in FB ;

here are some of it just view it I never edit it 'cause I have no free time for it sorry peeps ! =D

decoration of the dinner place ;

as you can see there's no table for us to have dinner so we use the carpet as a table .

=D

the appertizer was soup and these . it's pretty full after these .

Chef of the day ; Carmen

the assistants were

Jessie , James , Williams and Vanessa .

The mums' !

The main course of the day .

it's really good dinner we have but we have spent tons of time in the kitchen

I was pretty smelly after the cooked !

LOL !

We enjoyed the day and ofcz the mother's day present it's made from Carmen too . =D

I will take the picture soon . <3

you never know how sugary it could be .

What to do with feeling other than thought ?

she always hope to get a sugary lips but she can't ,

'cause she has got braces . =)

我突然很想写华语可是又很想加一点点的ENGLISH 。

So I decided to start something like this . =)

我突然才发现我忘了什么是爱 ？I was listening to my itunes but what to playlist play are all about love . Just like 刺猬 by Landy , Inside Your heaven by Carrie Underwood , Because you loved me by Celine Dion and also 以前以后 by A-Lin . 直道刚才我看回我以前写的部落格我看到以前的我有几笨去爱一个我不值得爱的人。而现在的我只顾着想念朋友还有想回以前，我知道人是要向前看可是在一个全新的环境我只想到以前的回忆没有一样东西是关于真正的爱可是最好笑的是我都不在乎。所以我打算面对我唯一的未来算一算我应该还need like 6 to 7 months to get back what I missed last few months ago like the memories I missed and the photos I forgot to take from them . 原来我还有一座山的东西还没有做，直到前几天我看一看FB我看到我所谓的朋友已经大了。 他，她和他们已经变了不再是以前的他们了。他承受了他应该得到的，她变女人了，他们都不在幼稚了。我想念的朋友已经不是我所想的了，而他们是不是都跟我想的一样？

I wish so hard that there are someone like you guys at here . The always smile ones , the always love ones , the always angry ones and the always greedy ones also dont forget the selfish ones . There are like thousand of people shouting but not like the old time shout at the form 2 or 3s' corridor . No one like us keep annoy the teacher and stand beside the rubbish bin . Some words to say it's just I miss those memories and I hope I can have it now .

我大概每天都对自己讲我不可以每天羡慕他们那么开心可是我大概已经麻木了。每一次看到我都觉得怪怪的， 每次我都跟我自己讲那是别人的事不应该再理了我再不一样的地方我也管不了他们的自由。。。

I just making myself happier in the life here . Life's too simple here , it makes me think too much and it make me keep clicking in their profile have a real look and it just make me feel jealous again ! I just can't stop laughing at myself for being that stupid in these kind of things and let myself suffering from the feeling of jealousy .

你不会懂我现在的感受你也不会要懂，因为再也没有人会去要想也没有人要去看到底这里和那里发生了什么事。。。

you never taste and you never wanted to try it ;

It's really hard to explain and really hard to tell ,

why she's being that way and being so damn alone here .

It's all written by her ,

JessieTanJiaXian .

appreciate the little moments of trip .

Trip for us and we enjoyed it !

Woke up at seven o'clock in the morning prepare ourselves and wait aunty Chris to pick us up from Glenfield to a town call Matakana if I'm not wrong .

Let the picture continue the love family story of ours !

On the way to the town and we kept cam-whore 'actually just me ! ' .

The view was great ! the sunny day just started .

after half an hour we reached the little town and we went in to a market which have tons of food ! Before that we saw a Dog post which let the customers left their dog outside it !

Lovely food of the market I just cant stop my saliva dropping from my mouth !

click to enlarge it .

the view beside the market it just local beside a lake !

Ducky all around it with a red hot sun and with some little tiny rain .

after that we went to a toilet and we saw a stairs which really black and I love it !

click to enlarge it or view it in FB !

Outside the toilet there are shop lots and it just beside a garden !

view was really really nice !

and we saw this car ! woohoo ...

D PONY !

who knows that is a horse but not a pony .

then we went to have a look at this small building .

Which made the cost of 1 million dollar .

and it is just a ....

TOILET !

yes , it's just a public toilet .

dont you love the mouth ?

please dont spot me .

another shot of us .

after that then we went to a vas company named , Marly and James if I'm not wrong again .

these is what they sell in it .

again ! I love the colour .

hoooo ...

Toilet of the shop It's kinda nice .

After that we went to another place near wine farm . and we saw something like erhemm ..

BABI ! it's a black pig and it's really smelly there .

after farming we went to a place which sell ice-cream in summer only !

rest rest rest we enjoy ourself and camwhore again ofcz with my love polaroid !

the store name , Charlie's .

decoration of it .

after rest and eating our ice cream dessert we went to beach ! and I just love the smell of it !

bright blue sky with a bright blue puma shoes .

posing posing !

after that we went to another small town I forgot the name and then we have lunch on the way we saw a rabbit car with a dog in it !

after our lunch we went to a place which is not allow people to go in .

It's a Tree house restaurant with yellow trees around it but the restaurant has been closed 'cause of safety problem . this restaurant used to open and it only can fit in 80 people in it however , cause of the safety problem it has close down .

SO SAD !!!

I heard many people say it's a nice restaurant and their food it's super nice !!!!

after that we went back house and relax again !

The trip would be that fun 'cause of aunty Chris she organized it to us .

appreciate !!!!