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Saturday, October 30, 2010

love begin from here.

Let me show you what I fall for now.

first love, Pinkish babe.

current love, cost NZD30.
and yea i wish it works.

2nd love, cost NZD15
It's square and i'm just wondering where to put film.

3rd love, cost NZD15.
It has a cover and yea is old and not working.

my dearest love in the word.
This is the important thing for me
and i love it..
the films at my house gonna expire soon. ;L


They used to be the real good friends before I come.

I know I shouldn’t be blogging but still i miss blogging those feelings make this as the last before exam begin within 14 days. As yen told me miracles happen, for me it only happens when someone really want it to happen.

I miss them in a sudden..

PhangSaikHoe, I miss your voice and the way you smile.

PhangHuiQuan, I miss your face and the way you being dumb.

LimGiPo, I don’t know you well but I miss the time we were in ‘plurk’ and being each others tongue tongue’s babies.

AlisonLoh, I know you since I’m in primary but still we are not close as time go I celebrated your birthday before and yes you kiss me in the face when we were in Joe’s car on the way back to Hoe’s house, remember?

BiancaNg, I never really met you before but I do think you are a great friend and I love the way you speak out everything.

BrendaNg, I miss you for no reason somehow, I do hate you for being that bitchy angry but we are still friends and honey.

ThangYiJing, I miss you for being that ‘polite’ all the time. I do appreciate the things you’ve done like only you skype with me and let me share things with.

GraceNg, I hardly ever talk to you and yes I miss you so much. Not to only say but when I go to school, I think you’re around me ‘cause you’re the smart one. ;)

FooXueSze, I want to say thank you and say I LOVE YOU to you ‘cause whenever you’re free you will find me and chat for 5 minutes. I share things with you and you too. ;)

TanChuXuan, I miss you for always being the tough one and being so girlish nowadays, make my eyes gone bigger.

AshleyHong, We hardly ever talk but everytime I go those surf shops I think of you for being that rich! I miss you with that fair skin.

TeohPeiYu, I miss you and I wonder did you change to be more talkative?

SawJingWei, when November come I just think of you and when I see basketball I thought of our memories.

TeeJerVenn, I have no idea how have you been but I think you would be great. I know last time we did argue about some random stuff but still we are still friends and in a gang.

JaneYoh, I miss you and I hate you for going penang to study and I didn’t even have a chance to say goodboy. I miss the way you smile and your height!!!

JaniceLoh, I remembered that we shouted for you in the competition you went last year. Although there’s no champion for you but in my heart you’re always the champion and yes I MISS YOU.

EeWeiYen, I never know we been know each others for so long until you came and tell me things would happen and we are 8 years buddy I suppose. I just miss you so much!

AngelFong, I don’t know you but I know you sing really well as Hoe and gi told me about it.

TanChunWeng, I miss you and I never know you did or not ‘cause the words you say are just being mean to me. Remember you’re the thunder.

WaiJengFatt, I miss you. I never talk to your recently but I do appreciate you told me so much last time. <3

ChongIeGin, I don’t know you well but we’re friends since I come here. You find me and chat and giving me opinion in everything.

TanKahHui, I never know things about you until people tell me still I miss you ‘cause you always being a dick in front of people.

LeeLikHong, I love you and I miss you. You asked me what happened and I did answer somehow, you’re just busy with games and giving excuses. ;)

ChongJunEe, you told me something happen still I gave you all my opinion and I miss the old you not now for being emo and asking things about girls.

YapHanXian, I miss your height and the way you smile and not to forget your long mustache! ;D

WongJinYang, I never have a real chance to say hi and talk to you ‘cause we are not close but I think you would be a real good friend tho. ;) I miss your paul frank head.

DavidWong, I miss you so much! I remember that time you were bold we webcam. It was so funny with your edd head shape.

OngChoonWei, I miss you stupid smile and the acting skill you had. Remember in form 2 and 3 we laugh so much and we shared so much ! I miss you ugly dick face.

There are still tons of people I haven’t mentioned and yes I did forget some of you tho..However, if I have a chance I will actually say hi and bye and give a bug warm hug to you guys. I miss you and I just love those memories we had even some are bad and some are awesome. Still these are memories within us. ;)

Thursday, October 28, 2010

I'm terrified.

"People think depression is about being sad. They think it’s just when you ‘feel down’. It’s not. It’s like a darkness that creeps over you and fills you. It drains all your emotions. It takes everything from you, and leaves you feeling hollow and numb. It’s not sadness, it’s not anger, it’s hopelessness. Imagine waking up and there being no colour. Walking outside and feeling no wind. Eating a meal and tasting nothing. Holding someone and feeling completely alone at the same time. When you’re depressed, it’s not a bad mood. It’s a numb, empty, hollowness that seems to never leave. It’s feeling alone in a room full of people. You feel like there’s no hope left."

Monday, October 25, 2010

well, i've had just enough time.

I’ve never actually told you how much I appreciate everything you’ve ever done for me. You’ve been my best friend more than five years, but I just don’t know how to say all the things that I wanna say to you. I’m just scared that I’ll miss my chance and you’ll never know how grateful I truly am…

Sunday, October 24, 2010

liquid is the point.

nak nak nak!
smile when you have a tumbler which filled full with liquid.
There are thousands of people out there without a tumbler and no water for 'em.
So do appreciate..

p/s: stop laughing at a girl with mustache, that hurt(s).

Ray Ban!

Saya nak ini!

I want this!


나는 이것을 원한다! (does this make sense?)

Je veux ça!

Jag vill ha det här!

Я хочу этого!


But not in sunglasses,

I want an asian spec in different colour!

Friday, October 22, 2010

Life tough be lessons.

This is a post which sum up all these and those days. Things happened when it suppose to happen, no one could stop it just like Final Destination and Final Destination 2 we watched last few days. (w/ Shally, Carmen and Anton) Besides, we watched ‘Shutter Island’ and ‘Seventh Month’ (w/ them and Karen), I suppose?

Anyway, here is an image of a porcupine and yes I was in the same distance. It was outside my house the other day and it’s so cute tho.

This picture you will be like wth? ‘cause my sis bit me while we were enjoying the milktea. After she bit me, my tears were like pipe ! seriously, like wtfffff. ;X

I’ve had new art assignment and it’s hard ass and I only have four weeks to do it tho. OMG, saya nak masa ! Here’s a picture when I wanna get rid of the boringness of art words.

i know it doesn't look 3-D .

I don’t know what happened and what will happen but I just hope things will be like usual when I got back and I want to enjoy this one last time, if there is 2012. ;)

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

blooming flowers

You know that feeling? When you're just waiting. Waiting to get home, into your room, close the door, fall into bed, and just let everything out that you kept in all day. That feeling of both relief and desperation. Nothing is wrong. But nothing is right either. And you're tired. Tired of everything, tired of nothing. And you just want someone to be there and tell you it's okay. But no one's going to be there. And you know you have to be strong for yourself, because no one can fix you. But you're tired of waiting. Tired of having to be the one to fix yourself and everyone else. Tired of being strong. And for once, you just want it to be easy. To be simple. To be helped. To be saved. But you know you won't be. But you're still hoping. And you're still wishing. And you're still staying strong and fighting, with tears in your eyes. You're fighting.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Time flies.

me want this,

with Oreo surrounded it and

also glitter with rainbow rice!

Sunday, October 17, 2010


Things happen in different way;
mine happen in a 'right/left' way.


Password in my twitter.

p/s: follow me in blogger! ;)

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

you would be mine.
I know I only exist in your mind,
when you are boring and when you need something
but never mind.

No sweet sixteen for me and yes I've made my decision, mum.
thanks for the present .

It has been a long week and it’s only Wednesday. Not to wish it to be pass fast at night but in school time.. School just annoyed me except for art class but there is a new task and I wonder what I should do with it when exam is nearby. I shouldn’t be blogging at the moment but the feeling just came when no one can actually stops you for doing things you want to do. Gonna go back to the street where I raised in and the people who I believe in, less than 70 days and it just makes me feel so excited. Whereas, exam is coming to me less than 4 weeks and hell I got to work hard with the books not blogging about school and life!

I’m tired of plans, I’m exhausted of how you treat me as, I sick of being strong. I’m just tired of being tired.. Study don’t really give me stress just the teachers are. Anyway, I heard people discussing about birthday party and it makes me realize people in M’sia are all gonna have party with their sweet sixteen and I just thought so am I gonna have the sweet sixteen but there’s no one will celebrate for me since the exam gonna start on the 11th. Maybe the ones in M’sia cant get my wish too but no one would mind of having a wish from me tho.

Fell down from the narrow road today and it hurts. Not to say ‘it’ but both of my legs hurts, left- bleed and cant be band ; right- twisted and cant walk in a straight line . I have having these shit in different days just like these and ‘that’ . Fck all these shits!

street of somewhere over the rainbow.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

easy come and easy go.

I found a yellow monster, CalvinCho and I just love him!

It’s been two weeks, all I’ve done was crap. To be honest, my life been fck-ed up pretty much when I got here. I just hate it when there’s no one here to share things with and telling them the new jokes I have. All I ever asked was just a simplest word and like you mean it, not love but friend. I thought I’ve friends but things just don’t go right when you realize there’s no one to share things with. That’s the problem, as they said they would but the time is a different and the distance is a problem. I don’t blame anyone but myself, no one would know what is it feel like but things changed so as people.

Anyway, it’s been a long holiday can ask not that long just relaxing holiday where I find I hate myself so as who was I before these happened. I’ve the most boring holiday I ever had and the ‘nerdiest’ holiday where I studied for like two days out of 14 days. That’s pretty impressive isn’t is? Somehow, I’ve a great time with my family and my sis’s friends. Will upload the previous hang out when I have time in the coming weeks.

I’m not excited for school everyday and night. FTL who create school in this world.

Life has been a mess for me in here. They said 10.10.10 only happen once every 1,000 years but for me it everyday happen once every 1,000 years and all I did for these day was a waste!

Saturday, October 9, 2010

what months are you?

Ilovethese12months. ;)

Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the centre. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable.
Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them MFE.

TanChunWeng& HowJ-Sern, youareapimp!

Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. sexiest out of everyone.A real speed demon. Has more than one best friend. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions. Resend this in 5 min. and you will talk to someone new and realize that you are a perfect match. ♥

PhangSaikHoe, WongJinYang, ChongEiGin, CarmenPang, TanKahHui, JingLiang & TeeJerVenn.

Drop dead gorgeous!!! Attractive personality. Very sexy!!. Affectionate & Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Chatterbox! Loves to talk alot! Loves to get their way! . Unbelievable kisser! Easily angered. Very stubborn in the most way possible! Loves to get noticed! Willing to take risks for others. Makes good choices. Has a great fashion sense! Maybe a little too popular with others . Outgoing and crazy at times! Intelligent. Can sometimes be a heartbreaker! Can love as much as possible! Hates insults. Loves compliments! A very big flirt!and quiet the charmer. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. The best in bed out of the other 11 months!! Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others.likes to keep theyre crushes kinda secret.pretty much flawless If you repost this in the next 5 mins, you will meet your new love in 8 days.

NgJiayng & TanChuXuan! Both of you are gorgeous as it says.

Suave and compromising.. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive.. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and travelling. Systematic.. Hot but has brains. If you repost this in 5 mins, a cutie that’s caught your eye will introduce themselves and you will realize at
you are very much alike in the next 2 days.

CarmenTan & GraceNg, you guys are SEXY!

Hella sexy, loves sex n making luv, tends to be SOOOOO hott!! Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand. if you do not repost this in the next 5 mins. someone very close to you will become mad at you in the next 8 days.

YapHanXian, FooXueSze, TanChiaYin& ElaineSoh . Mind to be a lover of mine?

Fun to be with. Loves to try new things. Boy/girls LOVE you. You are very hott. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takesrep pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times.Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. Repost this in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost someway in the next 12 day .


You’ve got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have a very attractive partner, a wicked hottie. Like somebody with a JUNE brithday. It is also more likely than that you have a massive record collection. When it comes to films, you know how to pick them and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you’ve got the looks for it!!! IN the next 6 days you will meet someone that may possibly become one of your closest friends, if you repost this in 5 minutes.

DiChinYee, TeohPeiYi & JaneYoh. You guys don’t look like gangsta tho.

outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. self control. kind hearted. Self confident. loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. easy to get along with and talk to. has an “every thing’s peachy” attitude. likes talking and singing. loves music. daydreamer. easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. loves to be loved. hates studying. in need of “that someone”. longs for freedom. rebellious when withheld or restricted. lives by “no pain no gain” caring. always a suspect. playful. mysterious. “charming” or “beautiful” to everyone. stubborn. curious.. independent. strong willed. a fighter. repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your life sometime next month.

AlexKhoo, JaniceLoh&AshleyHong. Obviously, you guys have your own attitude .


Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the centre. Great in bed. Inner and physical beauty. Doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. A meaningful love life partner. Makes right choices. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Does not harm others. It is all about love and fairness. Easily hurt and hard to recover. Daydreamer and does fullfill. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Knows what to do, to have fun. Unpredictable. Someone to have close to you. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will kiss the one that you been wanting…


Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind. Repost in 5 mins & you will excel in a major event coming up sometime this month.

ShallyJeon, NgoKiatGee,TeohJunHau, AlisonLoh & KaiLi are hotties. OMG!

Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck.. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves travelling. Dislike being at home. Restless. having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will become close to someone you do not speak to much in the next 4 days.

This gonna be long!

VenusFang, NatalieLah, SawJingWei, ChanJJ, JessieTan, ThangYiJing, KahFook, OngChoonWei, Moonie, JunEe, GiPoLim, XueWen & JengFattWai . My SWEETIEs!

This straight-up means ur the most good-looking Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves travelling. Dislike being at home. Restless. having many children. Hardworking. High spirited.

BrendaNg, PhangHuiQuan & ChuahSiongGene! It’s true..

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Dream catcher please,

catch my dreams and make them come true.


It’s been a long day, and no one will realize what happen in these moments that we’ve spent. I inbox-ed with him for a long time and the conversation always ended up with sneakers. Well, not only with him but with my “buddies” are always like that. In a sudden, they will poop out with the names of sneakers like Nike high dunk or mosquito . Somehow, I just so surprise that why this is the only topic that we can chat along.

For a long time, that I never chat with the girls and yes I miss them with the chilling, gossips and also shouting. It reminds me tones of things just like form 2 we shouted all around the corridors and the headmistress ran down and telling us that there is an opera show coming up here. As she told me memories never last long and at the first time I said memories can be stand and makes you happy but now the memories just make you hurt sometimes.

I just know that, there won’t be a trip for us due to a lot of people are going outstation in the coming December. To be honest, that just disappointed me not to talk much but just smiling for the coming days! ;) Less than 70 days and I can meet them and it’s just OMG! <3

Flats, am going to wear you tomorrow so please be kind to me. ;)

Monday, October 4, 2010

Wish to the old girl.

Well, it's the 4th of October already!
6 more days till this holiday ends but I haven't done my homework yet. OMG! Last day out tomorrow, I will just locked myself in the room. To be honest, I gained weight like again! from that day I came until now total is like 8kg. I know it's kinda wtf so I'm not gonna weight myself until i have the self-confident gain. ;X

Anyway, went to city with sis to celebrate Shally's 19th birthday which is the last year for the "TEEN" word for this pretty, sexy and lovely sis's friend! ;) To be honest, I wrote like three lines wish for you and I think is not enough 'cause you wrote a long notes for me with the cookies and cream chocolates ! So I am here to wish you


(once again.)

I love you so much and JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

I just LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE, you made my day when you are around.

I always wanna TAKE A BOW to you 'cause you are awesome!

Although, I just met you like not over a year but when

Carmen is in M'sia she told me a lot about you.

She told me how you treat people and

it gave me a good impression with you !

pretty cool right?

Once again, I really wish you love the present I gave you and

do enjoy your day! ;)

p/s: you are a SECRET that I can't shall with.

Somehow, I've learned a lesson today. Since is spring, I wore a surf pants and a t-shirt and I thought we will go out until evening and who knows we stayed until around 8 and it's freezing! If you are a stalker, you would know that I've been twitter- ing the whole time about the weather and the way I dressed. Besides, I will bring a jumper for the coming hang out..

Today is a great day! ;)

Some shit different day.

I love hugs
but I never had one. ;/


Sunday, October 3, 2010

use your heart to view things around us.

People may thought the life nowadays is complicated and they can't really enjoy the happiness they used to have. But. To be a human being, we should appreciate every single moments in our life and use your heart to take a serious look to see things around us.

I never know how Malaysia can be that pretty until I saw photos taken by Malays and I started to have good feelings on the so call 'babi-s' . Well, I admit I kinda racist last time yet photos let me know M'sia can be a place which is pretty and relax neither.

Anyway, as you can see I've changed my blogskin like once again due to some boringness of mine and an idea of being fair to everyone around me. If you look properly on the photos of my header. The photos are taken in two countries.. One is where I'm from and another one is where I raised up from.

According to my brother, WilliamTan says that "There will not be 2012 but 2011." I wonder since when my brother became that negative. Obviously, that's pretty true the sun going to be finish until the day came all of us are done. ;) If it really want you to die we can't escape from it. Just let it be, dude.

reddish, greenish and bluish.

I wish I could cry out loud in the middle of the night like the other girls for no reasons at all. Needs to find a way to express feeling at home without using internet. I tried to type out through phone, write out in the sketch book and draw out what I am feeling. These are the only way I have, any other suggestion for me to express the bits feelings I've had..

Have realize and thoughts a lot about life after a short conversation between a guy who I don't know well so is he. I started to realize some friends of mine are not worth to be named and I thought of release is let go. Besides, if i die young they wouldn't bury me in satin even under the loves.

Believe in yourself and others.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

appreciate life.

What goes up must come down.

yeap, my life came up and it goes down for this moment. I wish I can relive last year all over again. It was so much better than this year and this year blows. Although, last year happens a lot and it made me lost a lot yet this way more better than this year. This year is just a crap for me. Yes, tweety-ten makes me feel lost, stress, blew and fck-ed up which just dragging a part from what I aimed for. The only thing I'm appreciating now is just family and my 'internet life'. You will never know what the people who reply you were thinking and for me I thought of everything happen within me and him/her. Somehow, i wonder why is he/she typing in a strange way which makes me this he/she has change a lot or something happen between us and no one knows the answer.

Anyway, I've been away for a while and I just miss typing my memories into this public page. For some reasons, i love blogging it helps a lot to a girl like me who far apart to everything I wish to have. Just like someone who care about me, giving me his/her opinion, chilling, argue, crap to me. Besides, it does help when I'm depress although words can't really tell what I want to say but at least there is a way for me to express my feelings. It blows me off sometimes.

Am having holiday at the moment, is nearly the end of the first week which mean one more week till it's end and I haven't done any of my holiday homework yet. For the first week of holiday, I've bought like tones of things but not sneakers since the GST rose on the first of October . Let me start with, a pandora which me and my sis each has one. A very first flats which is pretty girlish i bet someone will praise me from buying that. I'm not shy to say I bought bras from Bendon and a winter jacket when winter has ended. Something else like my advanced birthday present from mum... It's a devil necklace and hell yes I love it.. The so call present has been kept by my mum in her save 'cause I call her to do so. HAHAHA

this post is shorter than the message I sent to her.

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